Saturday, February 29, 2020

Tough Problems: Gifted child cuts school, a struggler rebels

 Elmo H. Love, CC 2.0, Wikimedia
My PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series.
 
In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. 

Today's installment describes a smart kid who, at 12, started cutting school. The other is about a high schooler who's promiscuous and a drug abuser.

Thursday, February 27, 2020

Tough Problems: Self-employment fear, a scary competitor

pxhere, public domain
My PsychologyToday.com article today offers the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.
 
Today, I offer suggestions to a person seeking low-risk self-employment that can bring in a profit quickly. I also address someone whose business is facing a scary new competitor. 

Wednesday, February 26, 2020

Tough Problems: Bad boss, bad teammate

My PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. Today's offers suggestions for dealing with a micromanaging boss and with a low-performing teammate.

Tuesday, February 25, 2020

Tough Problems: No relationship, a troubled relationship

K Magnus Ornhammar, CC 3.0
My PsychologyToday.com article today offers the latest in my Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. Today, is a person who has, her entire life, had trouble finding a good romantic relationship. The other is about a troubled marriage.

Monday, February 24, 2020

Tough Problems: Chronic sadness, resentment

My PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in my Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. Today, the first question about someone who has a predisposition to be sad. The second is about a person who gives and gives and is starting to resent that it's not reciprocal.

Sunday, February 23, 2020

Tough Problems: Aging, substance abuse

My PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. One of today's is on aging, the other on substance abuse.

Saturday, February 22, 2020

Tough Problems: Money

My PsychologyToday.com article today offers the third in the Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions faced by my clients and my response to each.

Tough Problems: Choosing a Career

Today's PsychologyToday.com article is is the second in the Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions faced by my clients and my response to each. This one addresses two people's problem in choosing a career. 

Friday, February 21, 2020

Tough Problems: Lack of Motivation

My PsychologyToday.com article today is the first in a series: Tough Problems. In each, I present two composite questions faced by my clients and my response to each. Both of today's are about people who can't seem to motivate themselves to do much.

Thursday, February 13, 2020

The World's Shortest Career Course

My PsychologyToday.com article today offers my best ideas on choosing a career, landing a good job, negotiating terms, and succeeding on the job. 


Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Restraint or Expressiveness? Advantage of each

I grew up in the Jewish tradition, in which expressiveness was encouraged. In contrast, this year, I’ve read three books presenting the opposite. In A Man Named Ove, a Swede so prized keeping his feelings to himself that no one had an inkling that he was planning to commit suicide, down to where to hang the rope. I also read three books, Kafka on the Shore, 1Q84, and Geisha, which showed the Japanese culture’s venerating restraint.

Some of expressiveness or restraint may be cultural and resistant to dramatic change but doubtless, some volition remains. So, in the service of your considering whether to become more or less expressive, my PsychologyToday.com article today lists restraint’s and expressiveness’s advantages.

Tuesday, February 11, 2020

How to Do Life: The Musts

Having written 1,618 posts on my How to Do Life blog, perhaps it’s time for a bit of synthesis. My PsychologyToday.com article today offers what I consider to be the musts.

Monday, February 10, 2020

Whom to Idolize: Better than athletes, performers, lying politicians, and even scientists

In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I argue that it's wise to idolize your best self and aspire to being that person. I ask questions to help you tease out how to that.

So You Want to Try a More Solo Existence

A previous article described how frequently ignored and rejected people might get better treatment.

In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I turn to what you might do if you’ve decided to be more solo, at least for now.

Friday, February 7, 2020

The Case for More Gentleness in Your Child's Education: In choosing a school and how your child approaches schooling

Of course, a case can be made for toughness: It’s a tough world out there and kids better be prepared, both academically and personally. To compete in a global economy, education must be rigorous and such comfies as “safe spaces” inhibit the ability to handle differences of opinion.

That said, especially readers of my work, who tend to have high aspirations for their kids, may overemphasize rigor over kinder, gentler factors. In an attempt to restore a measure of balance, my PsychologyToday.com article today makes the case for gentleness in choosing schools for your children and in encouraging how they do school.

Thursday, February 6, 2020

Should You Strive More . . . or Less?

Consciously or not, many people’s lives are governed by one of two foundational principles: “I’'ll strive to be the best I can be!” or “I'll strive to be good enough to get by.”

As with many things, there is no right answer, only one that’s right for you at the present time. Perhaps the debate I offer in my PsychologyToday.com article today will help you make your decision consciously.


Wednesday, February 5, 2020

The Three Principles of Good Parenting

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Good parenting includes only three core principles. I describe them with examples in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Tuesday, February 4, 2020

Outsmarting Your Clients and Patients

Sure, some clients are always rational and statesmanlike, disclosing all relevant information, responding honestly, dispensing due praise to you, etc. But such purity isn’t always the case.
It can’t hurt to have some under-discussed but crucial tools in your helping kit. I describe them in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Monday, February 3, 2020

Remedying Underachievement

A subset of people who did well in school and on standardized tests fail to live up to their potential.

My PsychologyToday.com article today offers common causes and possible remedies.

Saturday, February 1, 2020

A Shortcut to Personal Growth: A quick and empowering approach to self-improvement

This is the time of year when New Year’s resolutions have faded and we’re back to business as usual.

The approach I offer in my PsychologyToday.com article today may be more helpful because it embeds these principles:
  • It’s quick. The longer I’ve been a career and personal advisor, the more I've found that the people who seek such counsel are more likely to follow through on something quick and simple.
  • It’s structured.
  • Ideas that you yourself generate incorporate many factors that your brain, consciously or not, determines are worth trying.
  • Your generating you own ideas is potentially empowering. If your ideas succeed even moderately, you legitimately boost your sense of self-efficacy.