Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Affirmative Actions: A short-short story in the time of coronavirus

Assistant Professor Lily Sakai heads the infectious disease lab at Pennsylvania Institute of Technology.

After staring at The Letter, she finally had the courage to open it:

Dear Dr. Sakai,

While we acknowledge your brilliance and hard work, we regret to inform you that we have given our department's one tenure slot to someone else.

Sincerely,
Anthony Williams, Ph.D., Dean
In academia, it’s up or out; If you don’t get tenure, you lose your job and, as damaged merchandise, your career is essentially over after it had barely begun. Even Lily's almond skin couldn't hide the furious blood rushing to her cheeks. 

Lily's only significant flaw had been her temper and now, with nothing to lose, it was unbridled. Aware that like all viruses, COVID-19 mutates, she tested ten mutations with mice to identify the most virulent one, knowing that the world's efforts to create a vaccine wouldn’t work on a mutation. She then cultured a vial-full--billions of copies of the virus--and headed to San Francisco Airport's long-term parking lot that serves its international terminal. 

She got on at the first stop, opened her attaché case, and read a journal article. Despite the travel restrictions, because of the reduced bus service, by the last stop before reaching the terminal, the bus was nearly full.
Shielded by the attache, she opened the vial. She wanted to die but, in the process, inflict maximum damage to humankind—She was the academic version of a suicide bomber.

In those final minutes from the last parking lot stop to the terminal, every passenger had inhaled a full dose of what she called COVID-29. Now, all the passengers would fly off, like bees released, all around the world.


She hopped on a plane to L.A. With flights cut back, the plane was full. She opened another vial, again shielded by her attaché case. 


She toured L.A, from the Magic Castle to Disneyland, Universal Studios to the Museum of Tolerance, where she opened another vial.  She ate at the finest restaurants as well as top-Yelped holes in the wall. With nothing to lose, she tried mushrooms, acid, and even heroin. 


One month later


There were worldwide reports of a new, mysterious form of  coronavirus, with deaths doubling every day. Lily was one of the early dead. 


Atop the death and mayhem of COVID-19, the politely termed “social unrest” metastasized: mass looting, first of drug stores and supermarkets, then of homes. The health care system gradually was forced to shut down for lack of money and because too many health-care workers succumbed to the virus despite PPEs. The internet and then all electricity died, in part the result of protestors who fired molotov cocktails and other IEDs into utility plants in frustration with the ever-declining service. Then the water pumps stopped working altogether, so there was no water, the true staff of life. First they killed the dogs, then the old, then the disliked, then anyone they could.


One year later


All was dark.

In an underground compound, which had been stocked with a year’s worth of food, water, and other supplies, dozens of the commune's members lay dead. Three remained. Down to their last quart of water, they crept up with their pistols, only to see the post-apocalypse: long-looted and burned buildings, no people.

When one of the three wasn’t looking, the other two, desperate, guzzled that last quart, trying to be quiet so he didn't hear. But he did and shot both of them in the face. 


He stared into the nothingness.

Monday, March 30, 2020

The Fact-Centered vs the Feeling-Centered Person: A debate in the time of coronavirus

NeedPix, Public Domain
Yesterday, I had a conversation that illuminated a core difference among people. My Psychology Today article today shares that conversation’s essence so it will provide an opportunity for readers to self-assess their openness to differing but responsibly held positions. That may be more important today than ever.
 


Sunday, March 29, 2020

Growing Tomatoes from Seed in 21 Easy Steps


1. In March or April, get a small plant pot or a paper cup with a hole in the bottom. (Of course, if you want more than one tomato plant, get more pots.) 
2. Fill it to ½” from the top with potting soil. 
3. Lay two seeds in the center. (Park Seed sells a wide range of highly rated, nationally adaptable varieties. Indeterminate varieties grow large and need be planted in the ground. Determinate varieties can grow in a large pot.)
4. Cover the seeds with a bit of soil.
5. Cover the pot’s top with plastic wrap. 
6. Put the pot in the center of a plate. 
7. Fill the plate’s basin with water. That way the soil gets watered without disturbing the seeds. 
8. Put the plate in a warm spot in your house, but out of the sun. 
9. Check the plate every day or two to be sure there’s at least some water in it. 
10. In 5-12 days, at least one of the two seeds should germinate. If both do, snip out the scrawnier of the two with a scissor or your fingernails. 
11. Prop up the plastic wrap with a plastic plant label or short pencil. 
12. Move the plate into a sunny window. From now on, only put water in the plate when the top of the plant is dry. After a few days, move the plate outdoors--a place that gets a few hours per typical day of sun. 
13. When your seedling has two or three sets of true leaves (the edges are lobed or serrated), it’s ready to be transplanted into its final home: a full-sun spot in your garden. To prepare the soil, dig out a 1-foot cube of soil, replace it while adding perhaps 25% potting soil or planting mix plus a handful of granular fertilizer—general purpose, tomato, or even lawn fertilizer will do. (As mentioned, determinate varieties of tomatoes can grow in a large pot.)
14. Plant the seeding deep: so that only the leaves are above ground. The rest of the stem will sprout roots, making for a stronger plant. Surround the plant with a tall tomato cage, such as this one available on Amazon
15. Snails like tomato seedlings. So if your area gets snails, put a 1” wide circle of snail bait that’s one-foot away from the plant. 
16. Keep the plant well-watered: when you put your finger 1” in the soil and it’s dry, it’s time to water.) Do water deeply, so the water reaches the roots. Of course, as the plant gets bigger, you’ll need to water more deeply. 
17. The plant will grow quickly. When it reaches about 2-feet tall (about a month after planting in the garden), to get bigger tomatoes, prune away perhaps 1/3 to half-of the side shoots. 
18. Keep the plant growing inside the tomato cage by tucking stems into the cage. 
19. When the fruit are just starting to turn from green to yellow, cut back the water by 1/3, that is, water, only when your finger has to go down 3” to reach dryness. 
20. Harvest when reasonably red if you prefer some tartness or fully red in you want to prioritize sweetness. With yellow or orange varieties such as Orange Paruche, Sun Sugar, Northern Lights or Brazilian Beauty harvest when they’re yellow or orange.
21. This should yield you wonderfully delicious tomatoes, and if you grew at least a few plants, plenty to give to friends and neighbors.

Saturday, March 28, 2020

My Sheltering-in-Place Diary: Mar. 28, 2020: How I'm staying sane

PublicDomainPictures
Cabin fever is spreading like the coronavirus. My diary entry of a week ago told you some of what I’m doing to stay sane. In today's Psychology Today article, I try to do that by describing my typical day amid “sheltering in place.”  It embeds ideas you may find helpful regarding practicalities, emotions, and even humor.

Friday, March 27, 2020

Marketing Your Private Practice in the Time of Coronavirus

pxfuel, public domain
Many private practitioners’ caseload has lightened because of the coronavirus pandemic, but if your decline is large or if your practice wasn’t full before the pandemic, the virus could have a silver lining for you: Perhaps it’s a wake-up call to take a hard look at why: Are you not sufficiently effective or likeable? And/or is it a marketing problem? I offer suggestions in my Psychology Today article today.

Thursday, March 26, 2020

Communicating Across the Chasm: Should we prioritize flattening the coronavirus's medical or economic curve?

Centers for Disease Control, Public Domain
My Psychology Today article today offers a a dialogue that synthesizes actual exchanges about the coronavirus that I’ve had with some smart people regarding whether, for now, to prioritize flattening the medical curve or the economic curve.
 
It highlights the difficulty of communicating across the ideological chasm. Of course, it has implications for discussing all manner of differences, including those have riven the nation before the COVID-19 pandemic.

At the end, I invite readers to evaluate themselves: Were they able to consider both perspectives fair-mindedly?

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Enduring Changes from the Coronavirus Pandemic

The coronavirus pandemic will cause major enduring changes. I outline them in my Psychology Today article today.
 

Corona Chuckles: My 31 faves

Laughter may not be the best medicine when it comes to corona, (the disease, not the beer), but a little gallows humor couldn’t hurt. It might even cut your cortisol. Here are my favorite corona chuckles:





2. Once they come out with a coronavirus vaccine, I don’t want to see any of you antivaxxers getting one. Don’t be a hypocrite!
3.






4. Prediction: There will be a baby boom in nine months, and then one day in 2033, we shall witness the rise of the Quaranteens.
5.






6. If you need 144 rolls of toilet paper, you probably needed to see a doctor long before COVID-19.

7.




8. QUARANTINE DIARY: Day 1: I stocked up on enough food and supplies to last months so I can remain in isolation until the pandemic passes. Day 2: I went to the supermarket because I needed chocolate.
9.






10. A couple of weeks in isolation with the family. What could possibly go wrong?
11.






12. It’s reassuring that even amid the shortages, some people have the sense to not buy buffalo hummus nor chocolate hummus.
13.






14. It’s funny how no store is sold out of essential oils.






15. Remember on New Year’s Eve, how we were like, 2020’s gonna be the best year yet?
16. Day 1 of Quarantine: I’m going to do body-weight training. Day 3: Poured ice cream into the pasta.
17. Dating in the Corona era. 1st date: Skype. 2nd date: phone sex. 3rd date: Screw the rules, come over.
18. The Coronavirus is God punishing us for the Cats movie
19. What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo and Juliet? One’s the coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.
20. You know who buys up all the toilet paper? Assholes.
21. I’ll tell you a coronavirus joke now, but you’ll have to wait two weeks to see if you got it.
23. Nail salons, hair salons, waxing center and tanning places are closed. It’s about to get ugly out there.
24. I ran out of toilet paper and had to start using old newspapers. Times are rough.
25. What do ou call panic-buying of sausage and cheese in Germany? The wurst kase scenario.
26. Back in my day you would cough to cover up a fart. Now, with COVID-19, you fart to cover up a cough.
27. You know what they say: feed a cold, starve a fever, drink a corona.
28. The grocery stores in France look like tornadoes hit them. All that’s left is de brie.
29. Still no toilet paper in the stores. They’re wiped out and you’re shit out of luck.
30. So many coronavirus jokes out there, it’s a pundemic.
31. 2020: Cancelled

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

Substance Abuse in the Era of Coronavirus

Adele Morse, CC 4.0

With more time on our hands and more stress in our lives, substance abuse is an increased risk.

As with a headache, the treatment depends on the cause. In my Psychology Today article today, I describe five causes of substance abuse and an approach to each.


Sunday, March 22, 2020

Tough Problems: Living with Coronavirus Restrictions: Avoiding weight-gain while home, talking with your kids about COVID-19

Pickpic, Public Domain
This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each, I offer a response to two composite client questions.

In the first, the person is worried about gaining weight because she's forced to be home most of the time. 

The second letter asks how to talk with a child about coronavirus. 

Friday, March 20, 2020

My Sheltery Diary: Thoughts and feelings on my first days of "sheltering in place"

My Psychology Today article today describes my musings after my first few days of being required to "shelter in place"---the rule for all Californians.

Wednesday, March 18, 2020

Tough Problems—Living in the time of coronavirus: cabin fever, job hunting

NCI, Wikimedia, Public Domain
This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first is from someone already getting cabin fever from being told to stay home as much as possible. The second is from someone who's been furloughed because his employer can now no-longer make payroll. 

Honor Your Mother and Father?

Pixabay, Public Domain
In these tough coronavirus times, we need to find the positives everywhere we can.

It seems like half my clients blame their parents for their malaise. “He called me stupid.” “She ignored me.” “They were overprotective.”

And indeed, much psychotherapy involves the search for parental causation of the client’s unhappiness.

In a small attempt at providing balance, my PsychologyToday.com article today offers questions that should unearth positives in your parents and guardians that can enhance your life or at least provide a bit of additional peace of mind as we go through the coronacrisis.

Monday, March 16, 2020

A Shortcut to Happiness?

Joy is hard to sustain. It tends to exist not for hours, let alone for years, but for just a moment—distilled happiness.
Listing your life’s joyous moments and keeping them in in a prominent place can be a balm in tough, even scary times. In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I offer an easy way to unearth your life's best moments.


Sunday, March 15, 2020

Tough Problems: Wants to lose weight, wants to gain weight.

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first is a person wanting to lose weight, the second about a person who wants to gain.

Friday, March 13, 2020

Tough Problems: Appearance. Caring too much? Caring too little?

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first asks whether 90 minutes a day on hair and makeup is too much. The second spends virtually no time and wonders if that's too little. 

Wednesday, March 11, 2020

Tough Problems—Sex: Fear of removing one's clothes, fear of making advances

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

In the first, someone who has gained weight is nervous about taking off her clothes in front of a new sex partner. In the second, in light of the "rape culture"/#metoo focus on many college campuses, a college student who is "very sexual" is afraid of making unwanted advances. 

Tough Problems: Facing Death---from coronavirus, end-stage heart failure

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series.  In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first question comes from an older person with an underlying condition who fears that the hospitals, already overwhelmed will, because of the coronavirus, will result in his dying prematurely.

The second question comes from someone with end-stage heart failure.

Tough Problems: Being out of step: Indifferent to pop culture, a Republican in San Francisco

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

Today's question is from a person who is indifferent to sports, pop culture, and what's hip. The second is from a Republican in San Francisco.

Monday, March 9, 2020

Tough Problems: Catastrophizing coronavirus, social anxiety

NeedPix, Public Domain
This is the latest in the Tough Problems series.  In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

Today's first question is from someone who is catastrophizing the coronavirus. The second is from a person with social anxiety.

Sunday, March 8, 2020

Tough Problems: Being TOO Happy?

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

One is from a person devalued for being too upbeat. The other is an heir who doesn't know how to deal with the money. 

Tough Problems: Negotiating pay when you’ve dug yourself in a hole; coming to graduation in an era of coronavirus

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

One of today's questions is about a person who agreed to a lower salary than is fair. The other is a parent who doesn't want to go to the child's commencement ceremony for fear of coronavirus. 

Saturday, March 7, 2020

Tough Problems: Big-Time Stress

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first is from a stressed-out teenager wants to get into a "good" college. The second is from a member of the "sandwich generation:" having to take care of teenage kids and aging parents.

Thursday, March 5, 2020

Tough Problems: Time Management, Procrastination

This is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

Today's are about a person who struggles to get even life's basics done, and a person who's a lifelong procrastinator. 

Wednesday, March 4, 2020

Tough Problems: Fear of the coronavirus, fear of dying

This is the latest in my Psychology Today Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. In today's, one question relates to fear of the coronavirus (COVID-19,) the other is about a fear of dying, specifically of cancer.

Tuesday, March 3, 2020

Tough Problems: A child who tests the limits, a child with ADHD?

My PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

Today, the first question is about a child who's always testing the limits. The second is about a child whom the teacher wants tested for ADHD and to be put on Ritalin.


Tough Problems: Getting a good deal on rent, a used car


My Psychology Today article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. Today, one question is about getting a good deal on rent. The other is on how to get a good deal on a used car.

Monday, March 2, 2020

Tough Problems: public speaking fear, a sabotaging coworker

NeedPix, Public Domain
This is the latest installment in my Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. 

One of today's questions is about a person who nearly fainted the previous time he had to give a talk. The second question is from someone whose competitor for a promotion is sabotaging him.

Sunday, March 1, 2020

Tough Problems: “My wife died." "My dog died."

NeedPix, Public DomainMy PsychologyToday.com article today is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each post, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each. The first question is from someone who lost his wife and is having a hard time moving forward. The second is from an older person whose dog died and is afraid he's too old to get another dog.

Tough Problems: Grad school? Laid-off a lot

Michael Raphael, FEMA, Public Domain
Today's PsychologyToday.com article is the latest in the Tough Problems series. In each installment, I present two composite questions that my clients face and my response to each.

The first question is about someone who hasn't been able to land a decent job despite a college degree and so is wondering if he should go to grad school, although he has no idea in what.

The second question comes from someone who has been "laid off" four times in six years.