The Art of Reading Aloud

Reading aloud well is useful not just with kids, but many friends and romantic partners also like being read to. Even at work, if you read aloud well, it can be engaging.

My Psychology Today article today offers tips on how to read aloud compellingly, which I attempt to demonstrate in a YouTube video of my reading-aloud my favorite story by James Herriott, the veterinarian author of All Creatures Great and Small.

Waiting Wisely: Coping with six common situations

Waiting can mean worrying, often to no advantage. My Psychology Today article today offers thoughts on six common situations in which we have to wait.

Embarrassed, Alienated, or Dispirited: Questions for three types of beleaguered people

Not surprisingly, clients come to a career and personal counselor not just about practical how-tos like how to land a job or romantic partner but to get past feelings that get in the way. My Psychology Today article today offers composites of three such feelings. Each is followed by questions the person might consider.

How to Run a Meeting Crisply

People often complain about too many meetings, meetings that run too long, and just meetings, generally. I run many meetings and my Psychology Today article today describes ways to ensure that they're efficient uses of time.

How to Be a Good Guest at a Small Get-Together

Much has been written on the art of hosting, less on guesting. This provides a bit of remedy.

So, you’re invited to a small get-together, perhaps with you as the only guest. It’s an opportunity not just to have fun but to make or deepen a relationship. My Psychology Today article today offers tips on how to be an appreciated guest.

Too Smart for His Own Good: How intelligent people can avoid being off-putting

Many people wish they were more intelligent, but I’ve had clients whose very intelligence hurts them.  My Psychology Today article today offers a composite example followed by suggestions.

Thought Experiment: Imagine That Your Unhelpful Memories of Trauma Were Erased

Thought experiments can help people break out of a rut. One that I’ve developed is The Amnesia Experiment: Imagine that all your unhelpful bad memories are erased. That means that any residual negative effects of trauma vanish.  My Psychology Today article today asks you some questions to help you decide if you'd like to change anything about your life.

How Has Your Family of Origin Affected You? A story and seven questions for you

I often ask clients to describe how their family of origin affects their behaviors, feelings, and values. My Psychology Today article today offers a composite story that embeds common answers. That example may jump-start your own thinking on how your family of origin affects you today. To help further, I’ll then ask you seven questions.

Starting a Small Club

Whether virtual or in-person, a regularly meeting small group can be a rewarding tool for growth and fun. The focus could be on, for example, books, movies, sports, investment, or professional and personal growth, what I call a Board of Advisors. (I’ve written about this previously.)

My Psychology Today article today describes an approach to starting and running a small club.

How to Use Rewards and Punishments to Get What You Want

One of psychology's few unchallenged verities is behaviorism: You get more of what you reward, less of what you punish. There are nuances to make it more effective while remaining ethical. I describe them in my Psychology Today article today.

Should You Write a Memoir? If So, How?

I have decided not to write my memoir, mainly because I don' believe my life has been interesting enough and I’m not famous enough for it to be publishable.

But many people would be wise to write their memoir, even if it never sees the light of day. My Psychology Today article today asks questions that may help you decide. That’s followed by a step-by-step approach to creating one.

Should You Have a Baby? 6 pluses, 6 minuses

My Psychology Today article today lists 6 pluses and 6 minuses for having a baby.

How Much to Try to Change? How Much to Accept?

My Psychology Today article today tells a composite story of a person who decided to stop fighting and start accepting. It then asks the reader questions to help them decide what they want to fight for and accept in their life.

Could "Think Happy" "Really Work?

A client called me the day before yesterday. He was ebullient. He had previously lived with mainly three emotions: fear, anger, and sadness. But at the end of our previous session, he decided to try to be happy. My Psychology Today article today describes what happened.

Toward a Great School Year Despite COVID

For many kids, it’s a double-whammy: It’s been a year of remote instruction, often only part-day. And now kids face a year of in-person instruction impeded by masks and social distancing.

How can a parent help ensure a good school year? Of course, every child and parent is different, but my Psychology Today article today should help.

Becoming a Great Communicator

Don’t you know people who listen poorly or who talk too much or unclearly? We all do.

My Psychology Today article today offers keys to being a good communicator. They apply both to your work and personal life, and may be worth sharing with your loved ones, with whom excellent communication can be crucial.

Becoming a Good Manager

My Psychology Today article today starts with a composite story of a disliked manager and then moves to questions I'd ask him.

“I Can’t Make a Clean Break From My Ex”

I’ve had a number of clients who kick themselves for being unable to cut the cord on their bad relationship. My Psychology Today article today offers a composite that describes a common situation, and questions to ask yourself.

How to Avoid the Lure of Scarcity

If something is scarce, we’re more likely to want it. That’s an axiom known by everyone from marketers to people dating. That said, it's not the best way to make decisions. You really want to make these choices based on the merit, not on scarcity, To that end, my Psychology Today article today describes tactics to watch out for.

The Case Against Talking About Your Trauma

 Conventional wisdom, especially among psychotherapists and counselors, is that it's wise to "process" your trauma. My Psychology Today article today makes the case that that is often, though not always, unwise.

Dealing with Fear of Marriage

It’s not surprising that the prospect of getting married can be scary. After all, you’re publicly committing, before friends, family, the law, and if you’re religious, God, to be faithful in sickness and in health, for richer, and for poorer until death do you part. And should you choose to divorce, it’s not only potentially embarrassing but costly and stressful, often for quite a while. Plus, if kids are involved, it can be even more difficult.

My Psychology Today article today offers a composite of fears that my clients have expressed.

Dealing With Fear of College: Advice for parents.

Especially if school hasn’t been your (or your child's) thing, the upcoming school year may feel scary. 

My Psychology Today article today offers a composite, drawn from my clients, that describes a parent’s worry about a college-bound child.

Dealing With Fear of Retirement

My Psychology Today article today offers a composite story of my clients who are near or in retirement plus my suggestions.

Dealing With the Fear of Topping Out: A midlife person’s efforts to wring more from his average life

My Psychology Today article today offers a composite story of my clients who are in midlife, plus my suggestions.

Fear of Starting Out: Tips for psychology bachelor's grads and others ready to begin their career

My Psychology Today article today tells a composite story of my clients who are at the beginning of their work-life and my suggestions.

What Your Shoes May Say About You

Shoes may say something about who we are. I explore that in this article.

Hope for a Grand Explanatory Theory of Cognitive Impairment?

MIT scientists just reported that the Ptchd1 gene may underlie a number of cognitive impairments, autism and schizophrenia but perhaps others. My Psychology Today article today summarizes their findings and lays out a basis for hope that such research will lead to more effective treatments.

Smart, Attractive, and Insecure

  A recent client, despite being smart and attractive, lacked confidence. My Psychology Today article today describes what we did in the session, including suggestions.

We're Too Manipulated by "Medals"

 Not only are Olympians motivated to work so hard to get a medal. We all are, sometimes to our detriment. I explain in my Psychology Today article today.

How to Deal With Difference: Discerning without prematurely rejecting

Most of us claim to at least tolerate difference but in practice, we're not so accepting. How can you be discerning, which is key to life well-led without prematurely rejecting someone? In my Psychology Today article today, I discuss this using an example from a session I had with a client yesterday.