When You Have a Gifted Child Poorly Served By the Public Schools

I often get letters from parents frustrated with the public schools' denying their gifted child their right to an appropriate leveled education. Here's one I just received. Below that are my suggestions for what she might do:

From: MJ [mailto:I'VE DELETED THE REST TO PRESERVE HER ANONYMITY
Sent: Friday, April 01, 2011 9:53 AM
To: mnemko@comcast.net
Subject: Active Smart Boys
I recently read your post Our Most Underserved Students: Active, Smart Boys, and agree with your assumption on this topic. I’m wondering if you can offer suggestions for parents? Our son is consistently at least two years ahead of his classmates in every subject. I home school him part time over the summer, in the afternoons after school, weekends, and breaks. It has been very frustrating for us, however, to see him take almost a “teachers aid” position in the classroom during the day in school every year. He has picked up the rolling pencil on the table, tilting his chair, staring out the window, tapping habits recently this year and this is a bad sign of boredom for the hours he spends at the school. Would it be insulting to the teacher(s) if I suggested he bring in work packets from home to work on after he completes their work?

I scheduled an appointment to discuss this with his teacher. I don’t know how to approach this without causing the teacher to become defensive. Last year the teacher picked on him and called him names throughout the year (if he answered too many questions she would yell at him to stop bragging). So I don’t want to annoy this years teacher.
I look forward to your input,
MJ (I ONLY PROVIDE HER INITIALS TO PRESERVE HER ANONYMITY)

Dear MJ,

Indeed, these stories sadden me a great deal, both for your son and for all of us, which is not helping to flower the students with the greatest potential for improving society. Also, your description of your son's behavior fits me-- I was like your son--the tapping, tilting, etc., bored silly in school. Here are things you might try:

1. Observing your child in class to see if there's more going on than you're aware of.

2. Speaking with the teacher to ask, "What should my child be doing differently? What should I be doing differently? And finally, "Is there anything you think you might do?"

3. Speaking with the principal to help ensure your child is in a better-suited teacher's class next year. Especially if there isn't a very well-suited teacher, consider having him grade-skipped one to three years. Here's an article I wrote about that: www.naesp.org/resources/2/Principal/2009/nov/N-D_p50.pdf

4. Teaming up with the parents of some other gifted kids to pressure the school into providing for gifted students' needs just as special ed parents successfully have done.
5. Perhaps start a one-room schoolhouse for gifted kids, which may not be as difficult as it sounds: I outline how to do that here: http://martynemko.blogspot.com/2011/03/smarter-way-to-start-school.html