Yet More Questions My Clients Asked Me

Midlife Malaise, Episode 5: Is that all there is?

"My Life's Great, Yet Is That All There Is?"

Toward Contentment

There's something better than the pursuit of happiness.

To explain, some people could be happy, at least for a while, being high all day while being ministered by sycophants. But contentment is more encompassing, more permanent. and more worthwhile. 

How can you gain greater contentment. My Psychology Today article today offers thoughts.

My Ten Favorite Quotes on Happiness

Here is the link.

Externalities An under-considered factor in how we turn out?

Today, ever more of us is attributed to genes, from intelligence to behavioral flexibility, from self-control to political leaning.


But might our mindset’s pendulum have swung too far? Might we be underestimating the influences of environment or, to use the current argot, externalities?

To make that case, and hopefully to enhance your sense of gratitude and contentment, my PsychologyToday.com article today asks you to imagine if you were affected by any of 23 externalities.

Getting Happier: 12 doable pallaitives

Who wouldn’t want to be happier? Alas, enduring happiness comes from hard-to-change things: genetic predisposition, early childhood, the quality of your current life—If you’re living with four roommates in a crappy apartment, have  a soul-sucking job, and your lifetime savings are in three digits, well, you’re unlikely to go through life skipping down the lane.

But there are palliatives, what I call, doables, that can help, at least for a while. I offer a dozen in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

My Search for Peace of Mind

Some people naturally have peace of mind. Without effort, they walk the earth with a sense of contentment. 

I don’t. My parents said I cried a lot as a newborn, was a colicky baby, in school was ever worried I was a bad boy or not smart enough, and from my earliest memory, feared death and dying. At age 10, I'd lie in bed calculating the percentage of my life I probably had left---in terror, unable to sleep.

So, clearly I've been motivated to try to find more peace of mind. And if you are not naturally blissful, perhaps the report on my attempts may be of use to you. It's my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Happiness for Sad People

By nature, I'm a mildly sad person. Not depressed, just a bit below neutral. 

Nothing can turn me into a ha-ha type. But various things mitigate the moroseness. I share some in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Ben Casnocha Interviews Marty Nemko

Ben Casnocha just interviewed me.TDTV #4: Ben Casnocha and Marty Nemko.

My affect was too flat and the hat looks stupid but I hope you'll find the content of value. The topics I talked about:

• advice for worklife success in a lousy economy
• the wisdom of championing unpopular causes that you believe in
• why the future really is China
• romance is overrated
• the frightening acceleration of media bias
• the case against work/life balance
• that life's goal should be productivity and contentment, not happiness

The interview runs 35 minutes.

Why "Live in the Moment" is such potent advice

The advice to live in the moment is ubiquitous but has merit. Reasons:  

• It gives you a fresh start--without the baggage of your past or fears of your future

• It precludes your being overwhelmed--If you're only contemplating your next one-second task, you're unlikely to feel overwhelmed.
• It maximizes pleasure: You are fully savoring what you're eating, reading, feeling, listening to.

It can even work while you're working. For example, as I'm writing this, I'm not particularly enjoying the effort to figure out what to say. But I make sure to take a moment of pleasure with every completed paragraph, when I'm done with the first draft, when I reread it and find ways to improve it, when I click, "publish post" and see it published, and whenever I get a positive or edifying comment on that post.