Making Your Party a Success

Throwing a successful party needn't be expensive but requires some practical and psychological savvy. I try to provide that in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

How Counselors and Coaches Can Stand Out From the Horde

It seems there's a counselor and coach under every rock. How can one stand out without being cheesy? I offer ideas in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Case Study: Why She's Unproductive

I had an session with a client on Friday that I believe offers lessons for anyone who's struggling with productivity. It may also be of interest to counselors. I summarize it in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Five Career Tips for Mensans

I thought you might like an advance look at my next column in the Mensa publication, The Intelligencer.

Five Career Tips for Mensans

You've always been told you're smart, and on your confident days, you believe it. But as you've probably become aware, intelligence doesn't guarantee success, let alone happiness.
These suggestions may help.

Go for a longshot?
Standard advice is, “Be realistic.” But the risk-reward ratio of aiming high is better for Mensans, at least for those that don’t suffer from undue procrastination.

Perhaps you might want to help understand the genetic basis of intelligence. Or create a 3D virtual exploration of the Amazonian rain forest. Or develop an ethics curriculum that will actually change behavior. Is there a big goal you’d like to tackle?

Of course, especially if you’re self-funding your project, you’ll have more staying power if you can control your expenses, the largest of which is housing. Might it be worth searching for below-market digs? For example, when I first came to expensive Berkeley, I beat the bushes until I learned of a widow who didn’t want to live alone in her mansion. I lived there for, in today’s dollars, $400 a month.

Whether it’s on a world-changing project or not, do try to get to work with people who are intellectually strong and who bring out the best in you.  

Don’t hide your intelligence
People who will think less of you for showing all your smarts aren’t worth worrying about. The right people---employers, friends, and romantic partners—will appreciate you for it.

Of course, that includes putting Mensa on your resume. Some unwise people will think that's elitist of you. Or they may think, "If you want to be around smart people, do it with smart colleagues in your discipline."  But wiser people will understand that there’s nothing wrong with, indeed everything right about, wanting to spend some of your time around smart people outside your discipline.

Of course, just because you’re letting your intelligence show doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to keep others from feeling inferior. So, for example, make suggestions in a way that allows others to save face. Rather than, “Here’s an idea,” try, “I’m wondering if this might be a good idea. What do you think?”

A caveat: Especially if you’re working among less capable and more insecure folks, you risk being sabotaged. They may tell bosses and others about your errors in an attempt to get you devalued. So consciously assess the risk-reward ratio of offering a solution: How likely are you to be correct and, if you're wrong, what’s the risk?

Network less
Workplace performers that aren't the brightest crayons in the box may need to network a lot because, in applying for jobs, they're unlikely to be, on the merits, the best candidate. To compensate, they attempt to develop emotional connections that make employers ignore their lackluster capabilities. But for you, networking, which is often time-consuming, may not be the best use of your time. Sure, if you enjoy in-person or online schmoozing, fine. But the standard advice to network, network, network, may apply less to you.

You can afford to dabble
For most people, dabbling risks career failure. In today's era of specialization, it's dangerous to be a jack of all trades, master of none. But you are smart enough to gain sufficient expertise in multiple fields. As a result, your dabbling may even give you an advantage. So when you reach that point of diminishing returns in learning something, you can feel freer to jump to that next thing you're curious to explore.

Give yourself a break
Being smart is a burden. You’re expected to always be awesome. Of course, you won’t always be. You’ll say something stupid or emotionally unintelligent. You’ll want a break from using your brain and just want to do something mindless. Give yourself a break. Be human.

Curing Excuse-Making Syndrome

A major differentiator between successful and unsuccessful people is the extent to which they externalize responsibility. 

I explore this and offer solutions in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Unvarnished: Straight Talk on What Works in the Real World

I aggregate lots of my perhaps too blunt advice in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Career Advice for Geniuses (revised and expanded version)

A recent article of mine offering career advice for geniuses is the most popular of my last 100, so in my PsychologyToday.com article today, I offer a revised and expanded version.

Hiring and Keeping A Players

Some organizations are wise to hire B and even C players: they're cheaper and less likely to leave. But other organizations, those that strive to be best-in-class, want A players. It's hard to get them but my article in PsychologyToday.com today may help.

Becoming a Great Entrepreneur

Here's the link to the video interview of me on how to become a great entrepreneur.

The New Rules of Success

Some keys to success are time-honored but there are new ones. I describe those in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

When Should You Pursue a Career as Writer, Musician, Actor, or Artist.

I love to write, act, and play the piano. I know how seductive artistic pursuits can be. 

But when is it wise to pursue it as your main livelihood? I explore that in my PsychologyToday.com article today.  

A Workover: "I Want to Work at Home"

On PsychologyToday.com, I've been posting edited transcripts of calls to my radio show in which I help solve the caller's work problem.  

Today's is about someone who's looking for a legitimate work-at-home opportunity. 

Toward Living and Dying Well

In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I offer an exercise to help you decide if you want to do anything differently in your life. I also offer suggestions on how to deal with fear of death and dying.

Dealing With an Intense Person

You probably don't want an intense person to turn their intensity on you. Even if you're not worried about that, you don't want to unnecessarily make anyone feel bad.  

My PsychologyToday.com article today presents four things you probably don't want to say to an intense person. Plus ways to make the most of these potentially helpful folks.

A Workover: Dealing with Unmotivated Employees

A caller to my radio show is a manager in a unionized workplace. He called in frustrated that he can't get his  employees to try anything new or even to do much work.

In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I provide an edited transcript of our exchange.

Living With Type-A Behavior

If you routinely hurry and get angry, you have what's called Type A behavior. 

At least in the short-term, it may increase your productivity but increases your risk of cardiovascular disease and being disliked. Longer-term, it's an open question as to whether it benefits your productivity. 

My PsychologyToday.com article today identifies common Type A behaviors and offers suggestions for reducing them.

Do You Want More or Less Control of Your Life?

Do you want more or less control of your life? I explore that in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Countering "I'm Bitter" Syndrome

I've seen an increased number of clients suffering from what I call, I'm Bitter Syndrome.  

Perhaps one or more of the suggestions in my PsychologyToday.com article today might help.

Countering "I'm Bored" Syndrome

You're bored at work, looking up at the clock or thinking about quitting.

Or you're bored in your romantic relationship so you think about breaking up or cheating.

Or your child is bored at school, and so fools around or spaces out.

Those describe a number of my clients. I describe that as "I'm Bored" Syndrome. Perhaps one or more of the suggestions in my PsychologyToday.com article today will help.

A Workover: She's Angry at Her Boss

On PsychologyToday.com, I've been posting edited transcripts of calls to my NPR-San Francisco radio program in which I help people solve their work problem. I call them Workovers. 

Here's today's, in which a woman is angry at her boss.

Countering "I'm Useless" Syndrome

Some people have stopped trying, in and outside of work. They may feel mediocre or worse, or that they've already accomplished what they can and that nothing else is worth the effort.

If that sounds like you, perhaps my internal debate on PsychologyToday.com will be of value:

Countering Sad Business Owner Syndrome

It's getting ever tougher for the small business owner to succeed. As a result, I'm seeing a growing number of clients that suffer from what I call Sad Business Owner Syndrome. I attempt to offer help in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Countering Sad Artist Syndrome

I have a number of clients that suffer from what I call, Sad Artist Syndrome. My PsychologyToday.com article today offers ways to address it

Countering Sad Millennial Syndrome

I'm not surprised at seeing an increased number of clients with what I call Sad Millennial Syndrome. What's a 20-something to do? 

My PsychologyToday.com article today attempts to offer some help. 

Countering Sad Politically Incorrect Syndrome

We all like to be agreed with. And today, when society's mind-molders--the schools, colleges, and media--mainly speak with one voice, a politically correct one, most people, at least publicly, say they  support The Orthodoxy: that we need to reallocate yet more resources from that privileged group, the white male,  to the poor, women, and people of color. 

But what if you deeply disagree with The Orthodoxy? My PsychologyToday.com article today attempts to offer help.

Countering Unhappy Family-First Syndrome

Many people are glad they prioritized family over career. And we hear a lot about them.

But in the confidentiality of my office, a number of women and more men came to regret that decision.

My PsychologyToday.com article today explains why and how to prevent or address it.

Countering Sad Lawyer Syndrome

A survey by Career Bliss found that being a lawyer associate is the most unhappy job in America.

Indeed, lawyers have good reason to suffer from Sad Lawyer Syndrome. I offer some ways to address it in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Countering Wealthy but Sad Syndrome

I have wealthy clients who, while not depressed, are sad. I call that Wealthy but Sad Syndrome.

Especially in today's zeitgeist, rich people don't get much sympathy but perhaps some deserve a bit. 

In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I at least offer them some attention other than to bash them. The article's main purpose is to offer some ideas for addressing Wealthy but Sad Syndrome.

Looking for Someone to Market My Writings

I want to hire someone to get more readers of my books, articles, & tweets. If you know someone who'd effectively do that, let me know.

Treating Sad Counselor Syndrome

It's not easy being a therapist, counselor, or coach. Progress may be slower than we'd like. We may absorb our clients' malaise. We may have to spend lots of time marketing when we'd rather counsel. We may give far more to our clients than our friends and family give to us.

So it's easy to understand why some therapists, counselors and coaches suffer from what I call Sad Counselor Syndrome. In my PsychologyToday.com article today, I discuss how to address it.

Sad Teacher Syndrome and How to Remediate It

Despite a less than 180-day work year, students leaving in mid afternoon, and, outstanding job security and benefits,  40 to 50 percent of teachers quit within the first five years.

My PsychologyToday.com article today addresses what I call Sad Teacher Syndrome. 

Sad Physician Syndrome and Healing It

I'm seeing an increased number of physicians who are thinking of quitting. 

I write about them and describe options for what I call Sad Physician Syndrome in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Countering Sad Job-Seeker Syndrome

In recent years, I've noticed an increase in what I call, Sad Job-Seeker Syndrome. I describe it and antidotes in my PsychologyToday.com article today.

Workover: Should My Daughter Go for a Law or Public Policy Degree?

I've been posting edited transcripts of calls to my NPR-San Francisco radio program in which I help people solve their work problem. I call them Workovers. 

In today's, a mother asked if me if I thought her daughter should go for a law or a public policy degree.