Saturday, April 18, 2015

My Journey Toward Figuring Out How to Live Life

I've made a number of stops on my journey to figuring out how to live life wisely. I describe them in my PsychologyToday.com article today.
Posted by Marty Nemko at 12:35 AM
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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Marty, for one, I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You do make a difference, especially if you help even one of your clients find a job in today's world. Whether someone that is more qualified should get it, is a question the employer needs to address--if they hire the wrong person for the wrong reasons, it stands that their hiring/assessment process is inadequate. If they know it is so and continue to use it, it is no one's fault but the employer's. That you helped someone get some type of meaningful work is a positive step.

I notice that you tried many things before finalizing where you are at today. Most of us in the world are like that--very few of us that I know can tell anyone what they dream to be fairly quickly, much less figure it out right outside of high school as everyone expects us to know. Yeah, everyone wants the famous, glory-strewn, or artistic careers because that feels like a dream to shoot for, but if everyone did that, nothing tangible or valuable would be done or accomplished. Many jobs are thankless and boring, but some are not when matched to the right person with the right skills, interest, or drive.

At 50, working in IT most of my life, I am burnt out and tired, and have no idea what I can do to move to some type of valued, meaningful work. I don't want to be a manager, and now I'm told that I am not "technical" enough by managers who couldn't build a PC or a server themselves (but I can). And today, I can't give up my job because it is too good to let go. While I am not the sole provider, since my wife works too, I don't see any real hope for a future for myself, especially with work I would enjoy doing, and it is hard to try and be hopeful for my kids about their future careers. The only thing good is that we, as you recommend, live within our means, and we don't live a flashy or "rich" lifestyle. Yeah, our neighbors drive fancy cars, and look down at us at our "common" clothes (from Target or JC Penney), while they drive BMWs and Mercedes, wearing designer dresses and suits with big name brands. And because we live like that, we have little to no debt, have a nice home for our family, modest cars that last for years (yes--Toyotas too), and money saved. We always plan on living on one paycheck in case one of us loses our job, and fight to keep the jobs we have. Of course, over time, it becomes an empty, joyless, soul-sucking battle just to put a good face on while doing work that you do not enjoy. I was sad to realize how much little fun I find in anything anymore.

Anyway, I totally understand how you feel, but in your case, I think you have made a difference and you continue to make a difference. In my case, I just go to work, and try to make the difference in my kids, because I want them to have hope for the future, even if I lost it for myself.

April 21, 2015 at 12:54 PM
Marty Nemko said...

Thank you. And what advice do your give to your kids?

April 21, 2015 at 1:07 PM

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