Baby Steps to Losing Weight and Keeping it Off

The Daily Eating Plan; A good tool for weight loss?

I have tried so many things to try to lose those 20 pounds, and yes it’s harder when sheltering in place. Even though I’ve purged my home of my danger foods (well, most of them), sufficient calories remain in my house and my restraint is inconsistent enough that I'm still wearing those 20 pounds.

Well, I got an idea today amid my daily morning reverie between sleep and getting up: What if I made a list of what I plan to eat that day? I’m decent at completing my to-do list, so might it help me lose weight?

I put the list plus some motivators on the kitchen counter where I do my food preparation. I share what I wrote and how I did on Day One in my Psychology Today article today.

"Pig" A short-short story about struggle with weight

A man's lifetime struggle between love of food and desire to control his weight. I explore that in my PsychologyToday.com contribution today.

Do You Know How to Control Your Weight?

So many people, including me, struggle to control our weight.

I don't often enough follow these tips or I wouldn't be 20 pounds overweight. But as someone who has spent a lifetime battling the problem including vigorous daily exercise, and know I could easily be 50 pounds overweight if I didn't use the following tactics, I thought I'd list them in my PsychologyToday.com article today, so you can do a self-assessment inventory to see if there's anything you want to change.

Should I Bother With New Year's Resolutions?

My PsychologyToday.com article today presents an internal debate on whether it's worth making New Year's resolutions. It also embeds tips on how to keep the two most common resolutions: losing weight and finding a good job.

THE Key to Losing Weight....Really

THE key to losing weight is STAYING conscious from the moment you're thinking about eating until the moment you've moved on to other tasks. During that time, KEEP thinking about how NOT eating is your reward: you'll look better, be healthier, have more energy, etc.

Your motivator can even be something one wouldn't expect. For example, a time-conscious person might eat out less by reminding himself, "It will take less time for me to grab something at home."

Remember too that it takes 20 minutes for your brain to recognize you're no longer hungry. So eat little and move on to some other task, rather than eating until you no longer feel hungry, let alone feel full.

I suggest you tape a sign "STAY Conscious!" on your refrigerator and another one on your dashboard, to remind you when you're out. Read it aloud often to lock the concept into the forefront of your mind.

And if, despite staying conscious, you choose to eat something calorific, it's probably okay. You've made a conscious choice that, at that moment, the pleasure was worth the calories.

I'd love to know if this little post ends up helping you.

The One-Minute Weight-Loss Course

I must admit that none of these tactics work well enough for me, but they're the best I know for losing weight:

• Love yourself enough to believe you deserve to be thinner.
• Weigh yourself every day, especially when you've been bad.
• Three times a day, say aloud why you want to lose weight: your health, looks, career, your kids, whatever. Say it with expression. That will brand it into your brain.
• Most important: Be conscious of every bite, deciding whether the momentary pleasure of that bite outweighs the liabilities.
• Eat something small whenever you're slightly hungry. Stop when you're not hungry, not when you're full.
• All good diets reduce to eating lots of veggies, some fruit, a little protein, a little whole-grain carbs, and very little fat.
• Eat the same things most days: the low-calorie but filling foods you most like and are easy to prepare.
• When you screw up, forgive yourself and get back to your diet.
• Find rewards other than food.

Update: A commenter asked why I didn't mention exercise. That's because current research shows that exercise, while healthy for other reasons, rarely helps you lose weight. Why? Because appetite increases in proportion to the amount of exercise you do. When ravenous, it's hard to eat little. Worse, having exercised, you feel entitled to eat more. HERE is a review of the research literature on the topic. And HERE is another article on the subject, which both discusses the literature and links to a Time article that also concludes that exercise is unlikely to help you lose weight.

It's all about the calories--but that wouldn't sell gym memberships.

One Resolution You Should Make...And Might Actually Keep

One of my clients, "Adam Michaels," has, for years, fought to be more responsible: set goals, not procrastinate, see tasks through to completion. He's had years of therapy, read a libraryful of self-help books, and had a few sessions with me, a career and life coach. Nothing has worked.

So today, I asked Adam, "Moving forward, do you think it's wiser to keep trying to become more responsible or to accept that this is who you are, just as I must accept that I will never be a professional artist." He cried...and voted for self-acceptance.

If he keeps to that decision, that may ensure he'll never accomplish what he'd hope to accomplish, professionally and personally. But continuing to try to morph himself into something he's not won't likely help him accomplish more. It will mainly just torture him, just as forcing me to continually take art classes would torture me without increasing my chances of becoming a professional artist.

Remember the story of the scorpion that asked a frog to carry him across the river. The frog is afraid of being stung but the scorpion reassures him that if it stung the frog, both of them would drown. The frog then agrees. Yet in mid-river, the scorpion stings him, dooming the two of them. When asked why, the scorpion explains, "I'm a scorpion; it's my nature."

So as we enter 2010, Adam's story may be a useful reminder that New Year's resolutions are generally a waste of time. We haul out the same old vows, the triumph of hope over experience, that this time will be different: We will stay on our diet. We will find a better job. We will be nicer to our spouse. We will stop using our treadmill as a clothes rack. And by January 10, nearly all of us will slink back from our resolutions, reminded yet again of our formidable resistance to change.

Sure, if you have a new, achievable goal, something that doesn't require a personality transplant, it may help to make it a New Year's resolution. Doing so can keep that goal top-of-mind. But if you have a musty old collection of never-kept resolutions, you might, this year, keep them in the closet and instead, make just one new one: "I will accept myself, flaws and all."

How to Lose Weight (Maybe)

I'm fighting a losing battle against aging. Despite eating fewer calories while continuing to exercise as much as ever, I'm growing a pot belly and my weight keeps climbing.

Dr. Michael Edelstein, an award-winning cognitive-behavioral therapist recommends this approach which I am trying:

1. Keep your house free of calorie-dense foods. Keep lots of fruits and vegetables within easy reach.
2. Write down everything you eat, before you eat it.
3. Read daily (with expression) the reasons you want to lose weight.
4. When tempted to eat something calorific, say aloud, with expression, the reasons it's stupid to do so.

I want to lose 20 pounds. I'll report back. Let me know if this approach works for you.