Practical Advice on Procrastination

My latest contribution to AOL.com appeared today and has already been republished on the home page on CNN.com/money and has been selected for publication soon as Editor's Choice on LinkedIn Today.

It's my latest thinking on how to replace procrastination with drive. It's not some panacea piece. I've found that procrastinators can't be "cured." However, like high blood pressure, it can be controlled so it doesn't kill you. The article shares what is working best for my clients.

By the way, a technique for reducing procrastination that I didn't mention in the article is to hire someone to nag you for a week. For example, s/he might phone you to be sure you wake up on time, then call an hour later to be sure you're doing the work you're suppposed to be doing, and then calling throughout the day to dispense praise or strictures, even perhaps such tough strictures as "You're acting like a loser. You said you really want to change. Now do you?"

My Current Thoughts on How to Replace Procrastination with Willpower, Motivation, Focus, and Drive

Obviously you'll be more motivated if you're pursuing something you're passionate about. But even if you're passionate about something, you may not be sufficiently driven. That's especially likely if your passion is shared by lots of people and you're competing for limited opportunities: for example, in the arts, environment, fashion, journalism.

And often we need to do things we're not that passionate about. You may, for example have chosen to be an accountant even though you'd rather be a singer. But to be even a reasonable successful person, in any field, requires drive.

Some people are fortunate to be intrinsically driven. They do everything with vigor. But if you're not, often these can help:

1. Break it down to baby steps, perhaps giving yourself a reward after each baby step. That's old news but it works, perhaps more often than anything else.

2. Be accountable to someone else: Tell people your goal (e.g., lose 20 pounds, get a job within three months, whatever.) Perhaps have daily check-ins. Or try a dramatic solution: Hire someone for a day or two to monitor you and keep you on-task, for example, in job searching. That may get you into the rhythm. Yes, it may cost you $100 or $200, but you've spent that much on an evening out. This will yield you far more benefit and even pleasure.

Getting Motivated, Staying Motivated

Tomorrow, I'll be giving a talk to a large group of long-term unemployed professionals. My topic: getting and staying motivated.

Today, for many people, even many solid professionals, a job search has become a marathon. The willpower to stay that long course has become essential.

Whether or not you're looking for a job, perhaps you might appreciate seeing a draft of the handout I'll be distributing to them. Feedback welcome.

Getting and Staying Motivated

If you haven't already, redo your resume. Inventorying yourself usually increases your confidence.

Do it the fun, easy way. Is it more fun for you to network, e.g., always lunch with someone? Cold contact? Answer ads?

Try something new: For example, if networking events haven't worked for you, try a professional conference or trade show, especially the exhibitors. Or answer ads--but only if you can write a top-of-the-heap application.

Break it down into baby steps. Use the fundraising thermometer my wife used?

Choose a narrow focus and become expert at it. Remember my client who decided to specialize in software product management.

Commit publicly. Tell everyone you're looking. Your fear of embarrassment may motivate you.

Get confronted. I'm finding myself more motivated to lose weight since my doctor said, "You're not cosmetically fat but you're getting medically fat. Your BMI is 27."

Daily check-in, perhaps with a ProMatch colleague, perhaps using a reward and/or punishment for each daily goal. Or use Stickk.com.

Establish a deadline. For example, wife said, "No job in six months? I'll take over your job search."

Volunteer or take a low-level job to put structure in your life, get you moving, and meet people. Particularly good are organizations in your field--that makes you more knowledgeable and connected.

Afraid of admitting you're looking for a job? Remember, today, so many are looking. Also, frame it as a positive: "This time, no settling. I'm going after what I really want (insert your target work.)

Afraid of sounding stupid? Practice, then start with your least desirable leads. And realize that with each subsequent contact, you get a fresh start.

Afraid of rejection? Successful people are rejected a lot. They learn from failures and move right on. No wallowing. And remember: being ignored is the new rejection. It's not that you're not worthy even of a rejection.

Afraid of imposing? You're asking for no more time than in asking for directions. If the person wants to give you more, that's his choice. Too, you're not asking for a handout; you're asking to work for fair pay.

Ambivalent about success? 1. Even bad people deserve a shot at redemption--honest work redeems. 2. If your success gets you more work, you can set limits. 3. Is it right to sabotage yourself because someone wishes you ill? Perhaps that person shouldn't be part of your life.

Find inspiration: a personal role model? A book? A quote? Religious faith? A famous person? Remember Churchill's so-frequent failures.

Make your job search not a choice. Simply force yourself to start working. No excuses. This is so basic, but for many people it's what most-often works. If necessary, just start with a one-second task. My father didn't think about whether it's pleasant--Snow or shine, he took a bus, two trains, and a six-block walk to open that miserable, little store every day.

One-minute struggle. If you haven't made progress over a stumbling block in a minute, you're unlikely to. You'll just get frustrated and be less likely to job-search. Get help or do it without solving the stumbling block.

Procrastination is a career killer. Remember: 80% of unemployed people say they're procrastinators versus 25% of employed professionals.

Stop abusing drugs/alcohol. Some people are helped by a 12-step programs, others by behavioral therapy, others by support from friend(s) and family.

Might you be clinically, not situationally, depressed or be bipolar? If so, exercise, music, and some cognitive-behavioral therapy, perhaps without drugs, may help. HERE is a link to solid information on depression. HERE is a link to solid information on bipolar disorder.

Might you have ADD/ADHD? If you're highly distractible, try eliminating distractions, and exercising. If that's insufficient, it might be worth asking a specialist if ADD medication is worth a try.

Embrace work. S/he who tries to accomplish as much as possible rather than as little as s/he can get away with is much more likely to stay employed, avoid depression, feel good about himself, and make a difference.

Remember my dad's story: Never look back. Always look forward.

Developing Drive: Replacing procrastination with motivation

I've just finished writing what I believe is my best article on replacing procrastination with motivation, willpower, and drive. HERE is the link.

I've devoted particular effort to developing this article because I'll be using it for three purposes:

• as the basis for the speech I'll be giving at San Francisco's Grace Cathedral this Monday,
• as the demo class that The Great Courses has asked me to do. Indeed, you'll notice that it is written as if it were a lecture for The Great Courses.
• as the basis for my NPR-San Francisco radio show a week from tomorrow, Oct 23.

While I always value your feedback, I'd particularly value it on this article. (HERE is another link to it.) Which of the article's 11 strategies do you believe would and wouldn't actually help you? Care to suggest any others? Does the article's tone work for you?

A Very Short Guide to Overcoming Procrastination

As we start the New Year, so many people say, "I'm going to stop being a procrastinator."

I've written widely on overcoming procrastination, most recently this. But readers have said its comprehensiveness is overwhelming.

So here's a highly abridged version. These are the strategies that have worked the best for the most people. Perhaps you'll find one or, dare I hope, all of them useful.

Be aware of the moment of truth. There's a moment when, consciously or unconsciously, you decide whether to do the task or go do something more fun. If doing the task is in your interest, steel your will and make yourself get started.

Accept uncomfortability. To be even modestly successful in life, you must accept that life often requires you to do the uncomfortable, tasks that require effort and aren't as fun as what you'd enjoy more.

Value accomplishment. Your worth is heavily dependent on what you accomplish. Once you believe that, you won't even think about whether to do the task. You'll do it automatically. Contributory people think, "How much can I accomplish." Societal takers think, "What's the least work I can get by with." Decide you'll be as big a contributor as possible.

Recognize that you can survive failure. Yes, if you fail at the task, it will be evidence that you're not that competent. But not trying ensures that you fail and perhaps that you'll be perceived as a loser. The good news is that probably, if you follow the advice in this blog post, you 'll succeed, at least succeed often enough that you're not perceived as a loser. If you're failing at work tasks too often, perhaps it's a sign you need a better-suited job.

See yourself as a follow-through person. A number of my clients have said, "I just can't picture myself as a follow-through person." It may help to retrain your brain neurons: Even though it sounds touchy-feely, frequent affirmations like, "I will be a follow-through person" may help and certainly can't hurt.

Divide the task into baby steps. Write them down. Don't know how to divide it? Ask someone for help.

What's the fun way? Every step of the way, ask yourself, "What's the fun way to do this task? Do it half-baked? Alter the task so it uses more of your strengths? Find a partner to work alongside you? Listen to music while you work? Whatever.

Get started. Ask yourself, "What's my first one-minute task?" Do it. Take a low-risk action.

Make yourself stay focused. Take your mind off everything else: other problems you're facing, the fun activity you'd rather be doing, etc. Stay focused on the task at hand. Perhaps remind yourself how good it will feel when you've gotten it done.

Use the One-Minute Struggle. When you reach a hard part, struggle to figure it out for no more than one minute. After that, chances are you won't solve it. You'll just get frustrated and stop doing the task. At the one-minute mark, decide if you could complete the task without doing that hard part, or get help.

What task should you be getting done? Should you force yourself to get started now? Do you want to use one or more of the techniques above?

Getting Motivated, Unstuck, Overcoming Procrastination

I've just written an article on getting motivated, overcoming procrastination. It's perhaps too cutesily called Light Your Fire: A Matchbox of Ways to Get Motivated.

It will appear in Mensa's national magazine in November but HERE's an advance look.

I'd appreciate your feedback. This is a draft and I hope to make revisions based on your input before I submit it for publication.

Top 10 Ways to Gain Willpower

Updated: Mar. 6, 2014

So many people can't motivate themselves to do what they know they should. Here are my top ten ways to gain willpower. Might one or more help you?

10. Embrace work. Work can feel as or more rewarding than play. Even though I enjoy, for example, watching movies, I feel better about working with a client and yes, writing this blog post. Because my work isn't too hard or too easy, it is pleasurable, and I feel I'm making a contribution--unlike when I'm watching a movie.

For my dad, work was a wonderful healer. After surviving the Holocaust, he was dumped from a cargo ship into the Bronx. He took the first job he could find--sewing shirts in a Harlem factory. It distracted him from his past and gave him hope for a better future. He finally saved up enough to open a tiny retail store in a bad neighborhood. While I can't say he loved his work, it avoided his living in the past, and made him feel purposeful, providing a decent life for his wife, my sister, and me.

It may be easier to embrace work if you always ask yourself, "What's the fun way to do this?" Even resume writing, cold calling, and interviewing can be reframed to be more fun. View resume writing as a way to figure out all the good things about yourself. Think of cold-calling as a treasure hunt, a backdoor into a crowded employment front door. Instead of an interrogation, think of a job interview as a first date, in which you're both trying to figure out if you should become more involved.

9. If possible, set an exciting goal. Goethe said, "Small dreams motivate no one." Worried about the risk of a trying for a big goal? You can usually control the risk. For example, use the time-honored approach of having a stable mundane job to fund your ability to pursue your dream. 

For example, Wallace Stegner waited tables at night and wrote during the day. He ended up winning a Pulitzer for his writing and founded Stanford's creative writing program, where his students included Sandra Day O' Connor, Ken Kesey, and Larry McMurtry. Remember too that even if you don't achieve your goal--for example, you never get published--your life is richer for having tried-- and you didn't, in the process, risk destitution.

8. Tell your goal to your loved ones--To avoid the embarrassment of admitting to your loved ones that you failed, you'll be more motivated to complete the task.

7. Don't think, act. The famous psychologist, William James, wrote, "The more we struggle and debate, the more we reconsider and delay, the less likely we are to act." Don't wait until you feel better to start the task, for example, looking for a job. Start and you're more likely to feel better.

6. The 6-step procrastination cure I teach my clients:

1. Decide if the task is worth doing: Picture the benefit. Picture the downside. If it is worth doing, do you love yourself enough to delay the short-term pleasure of avoiding the task for the long-term rewards from accomplishing it? Is it worth getting comfortable being uncomfortable?

2. Be aware of the moment you decide whether to start the task. Being conscious of that moment makes you more likely to choose to do the task.

3. Break the task down to baby steps. Don't know how? Get help.

4. Overwhelmed by the task? Try asking yourself, "What's my next one-second task?" Do that a few times and you may have jump-started yourself.

5. Be aware of your crisis points: when you're likely to procrastinate, for example, cooking when it would be wisest to work on your resume.

6. The one-minute struggle: After a minute of struggle, you're unlikely to make more progress. You are likely to get frustrated and quit the task. So after a minute, get help or see if you can do the task without doing that hard part.

5. Make it a ritual. If you're a job seeker, every day, be at your desk at 9 and take a five-minute break only after you've worked for at least a half-hour.

4. Keep your goal top-of-mind. It's easy to forget that you need to work on that project. Memotome.com will send you a reminder email twice a day. I'm trying to lose 15 pounds so I get emails saying, "Reasons to lose weight: live longer, fit in clothes better, look better. And remember, 'a moment of the lips; a lifetime on the hips.'" Update: Candidly, while this sounded good to me. It hasn't worked for me.

3. Go all the way: Instead of tackling your task in drips and drabs, totally immerse yourself in it. When it was time to start writing my first book, I moved out of my house for a week. I rented a cabin in Bolinas, just took my laptop (and my portable music synthesizer for recreation) and wrote for eight hours a day for a week. I got so into writing the book that it was easy for me to continue writing when I got home.

Another example of my going all the way: The only time I lost weight was when I was on a strict diet in which every day, I ate the same foods adding up to 1200 calories a day. That took the choice out of the matter.

2. Try affirmations. Some experts believe that repeating positive affirmations (for example, "I am going to do this!)-and visualizing your succeeding change your brain's neuronal structure, leading to more positive behavior. Viktor Frankl claims that his positive thinking helped him survive the Holocaust. Sports psychologists use visualization with pro athletes.

1. Have a cheerleader or slave-driver cheering, jeering, and/or guilt-tripping you into action.

BONUS: Don't let setbacks stop you prematurely. When you screw up, remember that winners err often. But winners don't get depressed about it--They ask themselves whether there's anything to learn from the setback, and they move on. Of course, if you fail and fail and fail again at something, perhaps the world is telling you you need a different goal. As Kenny Rogers says, "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em.

Okay, are any of those strategies likely to help you get unstuck?

Getting Unstuck

So many people know what they should do but can't motivate themselves to get started.

Getting unstuck is alchemy, an often irrational combination of one or more of these:

• Some confidence-building wins, even if in a seemingly irrelevant arena. For example, an IT guy who liked his field but couldn't make himself look for a job got motivated by winning a ping-pong tournament, writing a song he liked, and getting a second date from a woman he liked.
  
• Hitting rock bottom. Another client hated his job for years but did nothing to try to find a better one. Then he got fired and immediately started looking. Other people have to fall even further--One client became homeless and was drinking a half bottle of vodka every night. Only then, utterly sick of herself, she started to look for a job.
• Rigidly scheduling the task. Let's say the task would probably require 10 sessions of work. Think of it as though it were ten sessions of a class--Chances are, you'd go to all (well most) of the ten sessions. Love yourself enough to keep those appointments with yourself.
• Having a cheerleader to encourage you on.
• Having a slavedriver, yelling and guilt-tripping you into action.
• Going all the way: Instead of tackling the task as an add-on, in drips and drabs, totally immerse yourself in it. When it was time for me to start writing one of my books, I moved out of my house for a week. I rented a cabin in Bolinas, just took my laptop (and my portable music synthesizer for recreation), and wrote for eight hours a day for a week. At that point, I was so into writing the book that it wasn't hard for me to keep writing when I got home.
• Someone telling you "You can't" or "You're a loser!" Your anger fuels you to prove them wrong.
• Prayer. Many people are motivated by the thought that a higher power is watching over them.
• Stress reduction: via exercise, staying in the moment, minimizing stress-causing activities or interaction with stress-causing people.
• Adversity: for example, an illness, a car accident, losing a loved one
• Affirmations: Some experts believe that repeating positive affirmations changes the brain's neuronal structure, leading to more positive behavior.
• Falling in love.

Okay, what's going to get YOU unstuck?

Getting Motivated

Here's a list of ideas that I derived from one of today's career counseling sessions. I've written about most of these ideas before, but feel it might be useful for you if I list them here:

• Figure out how you can make each task as fun as possible.
• Break the task down into little bites and feel good when you get a bite done.
• Don't be perfectionistic. That way, tasks will be less painful to do.
• Do a crappy first version. It's easier to revise your way into excellence than to come up with it out of thin air.
• When you reach a hard part, don't struggle long with it. Usually, if you can't make progress within 15-60 seconds, chances are you won't make enough progress to justify taking any more time on it. Go on, maybe come back to it later, or get help with it.
• Feel grateful for your situation. Instead of resenting having to work, adopt the approach so common among the World War II generation: Accept that you have to work, no questions asked: You have an almost a spiritual obligation to not be a parasite on the world, and more positively, to use your abilities and training to make the world better, even if it's just to dig a drainage ditch.
  

Overcoming Procrastination

Here's the link to my just-written article, "Overcoming Procrastination." It lists the strategies that have most often worked with my clients.